Looking back at my musings about how hard this was, I realized that at some point I had stopped writing. Was it because it became easier? Well, yes!
It has come time to write something celebratory, something to give thanks for an amazing, love-filled, albeit challenging year.
I imagine my words echo what so many moms have already experienced, lived through and written about, but on the off chance there is a new mom out there who needs a little encouragement and peppy lift, here it goes.
She walks! The much anticipated event of ambulation. It is wonderful and scary and adorable. It will happen at some point, don't stress it or make comparisons at the playground. Rejoice when your baby figures it out. My shoe obsession has doubled, as has my capacity to love this past 12 months. I recommend the Melissa and Doug chomping alligators walking toy. We received this as a gift and it was absolutely delightful.
She talks! We have to watch our words now and suddenly I realize how much my Maika has been absorbing from our daily musings on international news and frustrations at the office. I realize I say No too often (self reflection on life attitudes!). Maika. Index finger poised and shakes it back and forth with a declarative, "no." Simple and ridiculously cute, slightly sassy. Her personality is emerging and I am so excited.
She dances! Raising our daughter in an urban environment has come with many cons, but a definite pro is that my daughter can move! She has rhythm and great taste in music. Unfortunately, when NPR is on our car radio, she is not exactly pleased and I miss Garrison Keillor.
She loves! As opposed to being her source of snacks, breast milk and general transportation, we are now the objects of her affection. Embracing our legs in a crowded room, fearful of local domesticated Pomeranians, confused by a stranger in a store, our little monkey turns to us for security and we are glad to provide. She will crawl up to our chests and settle in before bed, a warm snuggle that she chooses to initiate. It is so incredibly nice.
She survived! The SIDS risk drops dramatically after Year One and I release an overwhelming sigh of relief. Granted, the world ahead is filled with unknown dangers and I have slowly learned to worry less about the things that I cannot control. Given my profession, I have seen SIDS take the most wonderful, beautiful babies. I thank the universe for my daughter's safe year and can only wish the same to other moms. On a lighter noted, she survived my mothering too and I have weaned from breastfeeding!
She drank from a straw, she slept through the night, she has eight teeth. What more could I ask for? My life pre-baby was admittedly somewhat self-absorbed with time spent worrying about very trivial things. My life pre-baby never realized how many hours of awake time exist before 8am. It's definitely not for everyone, but I have loved becoming a mother. I hope I can keep doing it well.
Xo,
M
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