Ode to single moms

After a week (okay a-l-m-o-s-t a week) long business trip to our fair neighbor, Canada, my husband returned to aid me in the world of toddler parenting. I had long dreaded his trip for many reasons, but most of all I wondered if I could make it as a single mom for a week.

It was a challenge. 

Outside of just missing him terribly, I had to navigate small day-to-day tasks that once seemed so effortless. I have a fairly demanding full-time job but adding motherhood to that was like a daily marathon from 5am to 11pm. I did all the classic 'gasp' bad parent things. I put Maika to bed in her clothes for the next day. I relied heavily on boxed macaroni and cheese. I let her eat cereal bars on-the-go in her stroller running to catch the bus. (And to the mean bus driver who told me I wasn't collapsing my stroller fast enough, I say BOOOO to you!) Oh, and Elmo, I used YouTube Elmo. We are TV-lite when it comes to Maika but I was ever so thankful for Sesame Street's celebrity collaborations with Jason Mraz, Feist, Katy Perry, Alicia Keys and Norah Jones. Genius! 

I brought Maika to our Grand Rounds and my amazing residents helped entertain her while I held the microphone and fielded questions. I was initially mortified and felt horribly unprofessional with a lap full of crumbs and sippy cup hanging off my chair, but came to realize that parenthood has so much to do with community. I was so lucky that my work community embraced my child. I could not have survived the week without an understanding bunch of family-friendly colleagues

My husband's return lifted an incredible weight from my shoulders. I am so fortunate to have an actual parenting partner. I know there are so many women out there who can do it all alone and I would never say anyone needs a man to do this, but I am so thankful 

I have someone to share the responsibility and to share in the delight of our daughter's wonderful personality. I am in awe of single moms out there who do this day in and day out. It is rewarding and amazing to be a mother but exhausting at the same time. It truly takes a village, and I think many moms feel very much alone in this process...maybe group parenting is the future! We need to collaborate all of our resources!

So a week after Thanksgiving, I can say I am thankful my husband is so wonderful about taking Maika into daycare every morning. I can say I did judge a little in the past and turn down my nose at "convenience" foods and mismatched, rumpled sartorial choices. Ugh....I was a judgy-ignorant fool! I was happy to give myself license to just let go for a week and forgive myself for not being a "perfect" mom for a little while. I learned a lesson from my husband's absence...it's unrealistic to believe working motherhood is compatible with organic, homemade dinners and an evening of arts & crafts. I'm very grateful for modern day conveniences and the 15-minute reprieve  a fuzzy, red-furred, high-pitched monster is able to give me. 

Xo

M